I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
A guy just walked down the street dressed as Mickey Mouse holding a 40oz. Where the hell did you leave me?
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
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