bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Everyone thinks it's an okay idea now until I'm overdoing it on the vodka/clubs, dancing on a table, trying to make out with the groom.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
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