Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
he had hair everywhere except his balls
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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