apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
My mom and dad are smoking a joint while lecturing me on what to bring and how to act in Europe. I'll finish this glass of wine and head over.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Randomize
