BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
When I was hooking up with this guy last night all I could think about was if we were in Game of Thrones... I need to stop doing drugs
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
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