Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
