dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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