just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I didn't notice because vodka
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Randomize
