she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
I wonder how drunk we can get before Christmas Caroling turns into trespassing.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Randomize
