she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
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