Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize
