Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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