he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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