I just saw a 3 year old try to break out of a daycare by driving a big wheel at full speed into a metal gate. Today is going to be epic.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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