Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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