I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Randomize