I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
