you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
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