i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
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