i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
We're using joints as your birthday candles
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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