Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
youre lurking in front of me
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
You chased a rabbit then knocked on a police car and asked the cop "if he saw where that little bastard went."
I haven't felt more like a college student than when I woke up this morning naked with my sociology textbook in front of me and my bong in my left hand.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Randomize
