I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
No, I left myself a half eaten cucumber and a beer next to my head, pointed at it and said 'you're breakfast' and then passed out.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
