Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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