I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
