My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
Randomize
