I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
