Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Randomize
