He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Houston, we have a squirter
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
do nipples grow back?
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
