we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
the liver wants what the liver wants
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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