yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
i hate that you can chart my weight gain through my facebook pictures.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
