After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
My night was too much. My morning is even more. Help. I need to teleport the fuck out of here.
Still dying that you shit outside
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
