wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
