The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Randomize
