Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
am drunk, naked, and blow drying cat. need adult supervision
Randomize
