i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
Randomize
