can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
If I'm not drunk and wearing a penguin hat by the time we are done opening Christmas presents then coming home for Christmas was a complete failure
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize