Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize