That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
Barsexuality is the new black.
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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