go do what you do best...puke behind churches
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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