I can't watch pbs sober anymore
you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
Randomize
