why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
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