I just made friends with the guy at the coffee shop in borders. And by that I mean he stared at me until I was uncomfortable and left.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
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