THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
