Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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