Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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