I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Well, my family didn't see me in my drunken super slut state at Summerfest, so there must be a God.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Randomize
