Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Randomize
