what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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