So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Randomize
