i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Randomize
