It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize