we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Dude your not gonna get by security covered in blood wearing only a robe
Don't worry I'm drunk they won't say anything
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
